/r/dadjokes - top ten submissions for each month of 2017
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2017, December
18231 When my father said he had a 'Dad bod', I wante...
10840 What starts with an E and ends with an E, but o...
8179 I was a dad for less than 24 hours when I came ...
7671 "Whenever the cashier at the grocery store asks...
8078 My girlfriend said she slept with 5 people befo...
6584 You can throw an envelope as far as you want, b...
6897 GROCERY STORE CHECKER: "Paper or plastic?" DAD:...
6270 Orion's Belt is a huge waist of space.
5935 I've been a limo driver for 25 years and havenâ...
5989 69 and 70 got into a fight.
2017, November
23354 What has 4 letters, sometimes has 9 letters, bu...
16194 If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, ar...
11693 Looks like October is...
9547 So my dad had a tumour removed from his eyelid
9057 I dad joked a room of 200 teenagers...
8503 You can distinguish an alligator from a crocodi...
7786 My daughter asked me, "Dad, why is your nose in...
7373 After my wife had given birth to our baby, the ...
7538 I went into the local library and asked if they...
7390 My wife was worried about the size of her breasts.
2017, October
33792 My wife just gave birth today and after thankin...
15218 My daughter screeched, "Daaaaaad, you haven't l...
12708 Stepdaughter pun that I never thought I'd hear.
11139 We were eating dinner tonight, when my daughter...
8150 I said to my wife, "I need to call the doctor t...
7600 I said to my son, "There's only one thing about...
7859 I was tickling my son's little feet, when my wi...
7137 My wife got really mad at me earlier when I tri...
7196 I hate when people ask where i see my self in 3...
5559 My dad always used to say, "The sky's the limit!"
2017, September
20416 My wife accused me of hating her family and rel...
11436 What is the least spoken language in the world?
9518 I'm a member of the American Medical Associatio...
9430 My wife asked me to stop singing Wonder wall to...
9728 To the person who stole my copy of Microsoft Of...
8957 I have a simple standard for dadjoke quality: t...
7780 After my breastfeeding class, my husband spoute...
7698 My dad always told me, "Don't be quick to find ...
7187 My wife always says the way to a man’s heart ...
5779 My friend has been a limo driver for 25 years a...
2017, August
9179 I was told pictures dont do well on r/dadjokes
8104 Why do fish live in salt water?
7548 Statistically 6 out of 7 dwarves aren't happy
7576 How do you know if a sniper likes you?
6630 My neighbor blamed my gravel for making him fal...
6575 Why are people talking about Mayweather?
6002 Just saw my son crying because he doesn't know ...
6168 The Sun and Moon walked into a coffee shop toda...
5865 I told my friend people keep accidentally askin...
5307 You can't plant flowers if you haven't botany.
2017, July
8451 When my kids are grounded I read them jokes fro...
7472 Why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
7067 My dad lost his leg to cancer earlier this year...
7130 My boy asked me to hand him his sunglasses.
6355 Every time I visit my dad in St. Louis, he will...
6409 Every time we go over a railroad crossing, I te...
5978 I said to my wife, "They say that childbirth is...
6127 You might not believe that today is Canada's 15...
5624 I tell Dad Jokes but I'm not a dad..
5151 I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm ...
2017, June
8853 A man is washing his car with his son. The son ...
7750 My friend asked my daughter, "How old is your f...
8049 I was passing by my son's bedroom and was aston...
6681 My daughter was having a pretend dinner party w...
5947 My daughter yesterday: "Dad you're like a socia...
5531 You know there's no official training for garba...
5327 This kid at the school assembly is my hero
5269 I said to my dad 'What rhymes with orange?'
5126 I googled "cigarette lighter" and got 150000 ma...
4761 A pizza walks into a bar and orders a drink. Th...
2017, May
16758 Seriously, Wtf happened to this Sub?
10684 I tell dad jokes but I have no kids. I'm a faux pa
9224 I told my dad about r/dadjokes. He told me to p...
8125 I found a rock yesterday which measured 1760 ya...
8489 This sub is a joke and here's why
7001 My wife told me to take the spider out instead ...
6658 I may get fired or promoted... not sure...
6437 How did the people behind the latest hack escape?
6562 I asked my North Korean friend how he liked liv...
6214 I took my 7 year old son to the zoo today…
2017, April
22534 Imagine being held at gunpoint (bear with me) b...
15353 My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could b...
13519 I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferso...
7859 Sorry if this breaks the rules but, please chee...
6972 I tried to explain to my four-year-old son that...
7042 Son: "Mom, Dad, I'm gay.."
6037 A traffic cop went to the trouble of leaving a ...
6817 "That's what." -She
5731 My pregnant wife asked me if I ever worried it ...
5601 Why were the dark ages called the dark ages?
2017, March
13094 The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get d...
9144 Thought you'd appreciate my dadjoke marriage pr...
7206 Just witnessed this classic on the bus
6795 The year 2020 is going to be filled with so man...
5686 I bet none of you will see this one coming
5270 This sub in a nutshell...
4737 I thought my son was spending too much time pla...
4630 Why don't blind people go skydiving
4097 My son asked "what rhymes with orange?" I said ...
3500 My wife has come.to expect my dad jokes, but sh...
2017, February
23062 What the fuck has happened to this sub!?
8134 Anyone know why my post was removed?
7133 Joseph Stalin should have known communism would...
7105 My wife said DO NOT tell this joke to anyone else
5884 My son just became a father for the first time ...
5368 What word in the dictionary is always spelled i...
4948 I just dad joked my accounting professor and ma...
4707 Bee keepers have the prettiest eyes
4507 Here's one in spanish
4421 I entered a dad joke competition and won $1000
2017, January
25661 Is this sub still active?
8079 Whoever figured out the 'days of the month corr...
7073 To the guy who invented zero:
6248 What's Justin Timberlake's favorite part of Ukr...
5633 My wife complains that I never buy her flowers.
5057 [NSFW] I got into bed with my wife tonight, sta...
4830 I got drunk while playing scrabble and accident...
4558 I don't think Jeremy Clarkson or Richard Hammon...
4259 I went to go download the Communist Manifesto o...
4014 How many ears does Spock have?
